The Blue Castle by L.M. Montgomery

This is a sweet novel about a woman who, after being repressed all of her life, breaks free.
Valancy Stirling is a twenty-nine year old woman, unmarried, living with her mother and elderly cousin in turn of the century Ontario. Valancy is your textbook old maid. She's not very pretty, is quiet and subdued, and has never once been anyone of distinction. Every day of her life has been a disappointment and all she's ever wanted was one day of happiness, little does she know, her life is about to change forever. After a small act of rebellion, she decides to visit a heart doctor about some odd palpitations she's been having. She eventually learns that she has a very serious heart disease and has maybe a year to live. Valancy decides to stop living in fear of what other people might think or say, and starts doing and saying things she's always kept inside. She also leaves her mother's house to go work as a caretaker of an ill girl whom she went to school with who had an illegitimate child, and who's father was a known town drunkard, much to the horror and disapproval of her family. There is a man named Barney Snaith who visits this house on a regular basis to visit these people, and who holds something of a speculatively dubious reputation himself. As Valancy interacts with these people more and follows her own thoughts and wishes above those of other people's, and is finally needed by others, she begins to grow into the person she has always wanted to be.
The author was a bit wordy at times, giving descriptions that were a little too long about family members or situations or even quotations from novels Valancy enjoyed, but overall these didn't detract from the plot overmuch. There were also some annoying spelling errors, Valancy spelled Valance, Snaith spelled Smith, 'an' instead of 'a', things like this. They were few and far between, but still noticeable. I don't really find these annoying as I find it kind of a game to spot these errors in novels, but if that does annoy you they are here. They story is better than it's errors though, so I would recommend that you read it despite the spelling.
This was a very sweet novel. We are introduced to Valancy in all of her spinsterly misery. She was born into a tight-knit, very judgmental, upper middle class family. Her family does, and always has, pick on her for being unmarried and unattractive, and generally ignore her if they're not using her as a butt of one of their jokes. However, there is a hidden fire in Valancy that no one in her family can guess at, and after discovering her imminent death, decides that she need not be a slave to her fear anymore and let that fire out, as she won't be alive to have to deal with the gossip-mongering disapproval of her family. Events lead her to be living in the Muskokas, scenic cottage country a couple of hours north of Toronto, and the novel becomes a celebration of nature. The author describes the wildlife Valancy encounters with majesty and splendour. Her descriptions of the lakes and forests are magical. I have been to Muskoka and it was beautiful, but after having read this book I feel that I must go again, in winter this time.
The title of the book, the Blue Castle, makes reference to Valancy's dream castle. The place where she would mentally go when her physical life seemed unbearable. As the novel progresses, the Blue Castle moves from Valancy's dreams to the world she's living in. It represents her happiness, and as she openly becomes the person she has always been inside, her Blue Castle seems that much nearer.
This novel  was written by Lucy Maud Montgomery, the author of Anne of Green Gables, Emily of New Moon and many others. The Blue Castle is one of her few adult novels and holds all of the charm and magic that her young adult novels have. I would definitely pick up this author, not just this book. There have been film adaptions to many of her stories, including: Anne of Green Gables, Road to Avonlea, Emily of New Moon, and Jane of Lantern Hill. If you don't want to read the novels (which I recommend that you do) at least watch the films. They're all heart-warming, charming, slightly romantic stories with strong characters and whimsical prose. Do it.

Imitation of Life (1959)

I picked up this movie on a whim thinking it might be some kind of romantic comedy or heartfelt family film... I was unprepared.

The first scene encapsulates the essence of the characters throughout the entire story. The film begins at the beach with a mother frantically searching for her daughter. A photographer (struck by her beauty) pulls her aside to settle her down and points her in the direction of the police to help her with her search. Little did she know, a matronly black woman had just reported the lost girl missing, as she has wandered over to play with her own young daughter. The frantic mother is reunited with her child and allows her to play with her new friend. She makes conversation with the black woman while the children play and asks how long she's been looking after the child shes with (as the young girl is fair-skinned, she assumed the older woman was a nanny) to which she replies that the child is her own, but her father was fair-skinned also. The women become attuned to their daughters, who are having some fun with a sleeping man and a pop can, which prompts the young photographer to snap a picture of the two. The first mother, Lora, scolds her daughter, Suzy, and says they're going home. The other mother, Annie, had previously offered her services to watch Suzy during the day, but Lora had declined saying that she couldn't afford to pay her. At thy point however, it becomes apparent that Annie and her daughter, Sarah Jane, have no place to stay and Lori takes the two of them home with her. The young photographer offers to bring the photo he had taken to their apartment later (maybe to get a second chance with Lora). This first scene introduces all of the main characters, and perfectly sets up and provides a brief caricature of each of these characters motivations and problems throughout the course of the film.

Lora is an aspiring actress who, after being widowed, moved with her young daughter to New York to make it in the industry. Throughout the majority of the film this passion will come between herself and her personal life. Her daughter Suzy is a sweet, good-hearted child and just wants her mother's love, which may be the motivation behind what develops into a crush for the young photographer, Steve, who has an undying flame for her mother.

Annie's goal in life seems to be to do whatever she can to secure a safe place for her daughter Sarah Jane to grow up in, including working for free for Lora as a live in maid and nanny. The problem is that Sarah Jane detests her negro heritage and everything that comes with it (in the 1950's). Because of her fair appearance, Sarah Jane is able to pass for a white girl and avoid racism and discrimination... That is until her well-meaning mother comes into the picture. Sarah Jane constantly renounces her black heritage and condemns her mother for existing, thereby informing the world that she is not white, but is black, and is entitled to the poor treatment of all of the other blacks. Her struggle is trying to escape a world of discrimination for a world of inherent privilege, where she doesn't have to live in back rooms and always come second to whites.  This struggle is continuously thwarted by her very black mother however, unintentionally, as she tries to love and care for her daughter.

I really enjoyed this film, much more than I initially thought I would be. I was completely drawn in and emotionally attached myself to the characters and their struggles. Lora and Annie are both such strong women who do everything in their power to improve the lives of their daughters, but ironically it is those very efforts that drive their children away from them. There is a bit of a misogynistic message by the writers, implying that a woman cannot successfully care for their children by working or leaving the house, that they should be in the home while the man works or their children might be a bit messed up, but this is the 50's. The name of the film is beautifully appropriate also, imitation of life. Both of these pairs are striving for some sort of ideal existence, but both fall short of that mark. Lora strives to be a true artist and live off of her art too, but to make it big... or at least put some food on the table, she ends up compromising some of her morals at the direction of her agent (though things never get grimy, it remains a family film). She also achieves a life of glamour and prestige, but the victory is hollow as she must sacrifice family life and romance to pursue her ambition. Also, her life as an actress adds a level of falseness to her interactions that she struggles with as her success grows. Suzy just wants her mom to be home and spend time with her, but that dream is never realized and she is left living a life without that need filled. As for Annie and Sarah Jane, they both live a sort of imitation of 'life' as black women. They will never fit into their society the way Lora and Suzy do, but the way Sarah Jane tries so hard to fake it, to... imitate the race she sees as more privileged. And Annie would just like her daughter to live a good life and take pride in who she is, but she never lets her concern show externally, presenting a contented, pleasant facade.

This was a captivating film. It was an intense drama, but it never got grimy in the character's decent into their struggles. There wasn't that feeling of 'no hope', where a character had fallen too far from where they felt they should be, where there would be little chance for redemption. Circumstances always held an aura of hope, because each character was trying so hard only to better their situation in life. There was also the theme of family connection and communion, both between mother and daughter as well as between the four women collectively. They worked together and kept together (kind of) to build themselves up from their unpleasant situations. Even in the face of one person's disaster, there was always another one of the women around to help out the person suffering, or to offer a word of consolation or demonstrate affection. There was never the impression that these women were alone and had to deal with a big, scary world by themselves and with everything working against them. Even at their individual darkest moments, there was always a shoulder to lean on and a helping hand within reach. This fact is what I think didn't make this movie as depressing as it could have been. They were a family and stuck together, especially when times got tough. It's a bit of a deviation from the 1934 version, but I would say that this one would be the one out of the two to watch, if you only have time/ inclination for one. I definitely recommend this film.

Welcome To The Dollhouse (1995)

One of the best ways I can think of to describe this movie is to say this is a possible precursor to the romance movies about the frumpy girl with low self-esteem and a 'bad self-image' who believes she's a loser. A story to set up how someone could come to be the mousey, frumpy secretary who loathes her life.  As the title suggests, the film comments on how the 'perfect family' or 'perfect life', such as the kind you might find in a child's dollhouse, is about as close to reality as a doll is to a human girl, and what the terror of trying to make that connection might be like.

The main character of this story is a girl named Dawn Weiner. She's in her first year of middle school, has no friends save one neighbourhood boy a year younger than her, and is savagely bullied at school. Her life is a daily torment. Her locker is tattooed with insults and profanity, she is ignored by almost everyone, except when they want to harass her, and the only person who is continually interested in her is a delinquent bully boy who threatens to rape her.

Her life at home is no better. She is a middle child and is perpetually overshadowed by her perfect, adorable younger sister and her smart and obedient older brother. Silenced in all arenas of her life, she starts quietly acting out; calling her sister some of the names she's called at school, making every interaction with her parents a confrontation, and even causing a small crisis with her sister's safety. All of these come to naught however and just leave Dawn feeling more frustrated and unwanted than ever before.

She tries to sooth the feelings of rejection most often by seeking some way to become socially relevant, which comes in the form of hero-worshiping one of the guys in her brother's garage band. Her brother is a nerd and he and his friends cannot play their instruments very well, but he bribes the most popular kid in school to play with them in exchange for helping him pass him computer science class. Dawn becomes intrigued with him when she finds out he's a bit of a playboy and tries to get close to him, interested in the attention he gives to girls. She even seeks out the bully who threatened to rape her, almost as if acknowledging that abusive attention is better than none at all. The movie ends on a very somber note, displaying Dawn accepting her discontent with hollow docility.

Dawn's struggle of feeling unwanted, unimportant, and bullied increases steadily throughout the film, but her reaction to her situation does not significantly alter as her treatment gets worse. It's almost as if she's come to the decision that they might be right and that any real fight would be a waste of time. No one would be on her side anyway. Everyone else around her seems to have a more secure position in life or a stronger goal or passion for themselves than she does, and she just seems to get left behind and trampled over as a result of not being able to stand up for herself. She can't seem to be as 'perfect' as her siblings, or as popular as the kids at school and is left grasping at straws as she realizes that she doesn't feel that she fits into any social category she knows of, and everyone around her doesn't seem to have the time to deal with her difference. Too timid to assert herself and her importance as an individual, she accepts the oppressive silencing of her individuality by her culture.

This movie is also a story about a gentle, caring girl who slowly changes as she faces the harsh reality that the world is not fair. From Dawn's interaction with others and from the way she carries herself in the beginning of the story, the viewer gets the impression that she's an innocent child that would err on the side of good rather than evil. Her daily harassment at school and invisibility at home slowly changes how she interacts with people however. She stops hanging out with who she usually hangs out with and starts being meaner to others, quietly. She starts seeking out a superficial existence of sexuality (again without much commitment as she has trouble affirming anything about herself) because being real has only brought her pain. She is given many chances to act, and seeks out various people and situations, but never commits herself to a definite course of action. She doesn't fit anywhere in her world. At home, her family is too busy with their own affairs to notice or care about her and at school there is no clique that suits her. The mean kids are too mean, the smart kids are too smart, the cool kids too cool. She's just left floating adrift, a bit of fluff passing from one space to another, never finding a place to settle and solidify.

After watching this, I had a minor onset of anxiety, and will probably not watch it again. We all have fears and insecurities about who we are and how we're perceived, but this girl's life is only rejection and abuse (not severe, but enough to be damaging). She's a quiet girl who doesn't react loudly to neglect, but instead just slowly wilts over time, which is almost a more terrifying prospect.

An uncomfortable film to watch.